Wednesday, July 15, 2009

a question for God

There will be many questions I ask of God when I meet Him, after I take the time to feel what it's like to sit in His presence of course, but lets say that part is all over, I'm past the awe of it (again, let's just say) and we're walking around just chatting...I have a lot of questions for Him. Questions like why do you allow some people to be parents that have no business being parents? Not that I'm some great Mom, it's more that there are people out there who have no clue what it means to be a true parent, who don't want to be a parent, they do it simply because we as society make them feel "it's the right thing to do". I guess when you're 41 years old it looks sort of odd to suddenly walk from your children's lives, but then are you really in it to begin with? Oh you get them the standard every other weekend,but that's only because it's a court order; if you were getting them because you longed to be with them you'd get them more than that. You'd see them every single moment you could, you'd call them to simply say hi and you'd most certainly pay your child support because you'd understand that the support is for the well being of your CHILD.

So, yes I shall ask God why some are allowed to become parents when they don't deserve it nor do they want it.

I don't feel I am raising kids, I've always looked at it as I'm raising future adults. My job as a parent is to teach them how to become productive adults of this world, to leave something behind, not always take but give, and to understand that God is at the center of it all. My job is also to fight for them, regardless of who I'm fighting against. I'm truly a mother bear when it comes to my kids, I will fly across the table so fast I don't feel the table if the need arises. It's my job.

Nothing makes me more angry than to hear of a parent not taking care of their child. You do the right thing because it's no longer about you. When you become a mom/dad you are no longer first, no longer the center of the universe; when you give life to another human being who's sole survival depends on you...then step up to the plate and be a man, do the right thing. It's just that simple.

Someone asked me one time to describe parenting in one word and I said "draining". If you do it right, if you are engaged and in it with both feet you're drained at the end of the day...and you should be! We worry about what you eat, who your friends are, will you get hurt, will I have to hurt the one who hurt you, will you succeed in life right away, will you learn from the mistakes around you or make them too, will you endure your first heartache, will you stay out of trouble, will you be a responsible adult, will you be a leader, will you follow God's voice...I could keep going. The point is a parent never gets a day off, never sleeps a deep sleep because we listen for a cry (even when your 14), never makes enough money to give you all you want. A parent never feels they did all correctly and always wishes they could do it again. A parent loves in ways they never knew existed and cries now when someone says I love you daddy/mommy on a commercial. It's a huge responsibility and I just don't get why some are allowed to have it.