Saturday, March 21, 2009


Last night I went out with friends and laughed my butt off, I love to laugh. I read the other day that children laugh over 400 times a day and adults...less than 30. How sad is that!! I would venture to say Christians laugh even less, at least that is my perception. We get so serious about life, but I want to challenge us in that we can take our lives as Christ followers very seriously while still taking time to enjoy the silly things in life and simply laugh.

My youngest got off the bus Friday with a sucker in her mouth so I asked if the bus driver was now letting them eat on the bus and she said "oh yes, Mom, she does...when she's not looking she lets us eat anything we want!" Laugh at that cause that my friend is funny!!

Our world is experiencing difficult times, but honestly haven't we always to some degree? I mean life has never ever simply been easy, it's just harder at times. It's important now more than ever to teach our youth that even in the middle of the storm we need to take time to enjoy this life God has so graciously given us.

You don't have to pay to laugh!! ;)

Till next time my friend....

Tuesday, March 17, 2009


So, I've thought about this post for awhile now due to past conversations but wasn't sure I wanted to be this vulnerable...but I also know that just cause it sounds good in my head doesn't mean it's good and this is a topic I take very seriously. As much as I enjoy being single, I truly long to love a man with all my heart. I am guarded, probably to a fault so, I've decided to let you in in the hopes something good comes from it. ya go...

I've had conversations with people about whether or not one should have a "list" know a list of what you want your spouse to be's my list....I look forward to your thoughts...

You will love God deeper than you'll ever love me. Not that you'll be perfect or even pretend to be perfect, but more like when you're mad at me you'll turn to God for answers instead of lashing out in anger and saying hurtful things. More like when our relationship struggles you'll turn to God instead of to your friends who will only fuel the fire. More like you'll see me as the daughter of God that I am instead of just another woman.

You'll respect my family. Not that you have to like it all or even agree with decisions but you'll understand that at the end of they day they are my family and I will never walk away from them. You'll understand my family has it's own set of "rules" and you'll know that though I love for you to stand up for me, there are times when it's not appropriate because it's my battle to fight as I see fit. You'll support me, love me, and pray with me. But you'll respect them...always.

You won't be an alcoholoic. Not that you can't drink, but that you understand the difference between having a drink and the drink having you. Enough said.

You will love me, I mean really truly love me. I understand there will be times when you won't like me, but you'll love me. And because you love me you'll not threaten me with divorce, you'll not cheat on me, you'll not abuse me, you'll seek to understand how to love me as the unique woman I am.

You'll be patient with my walls. Understanding my past helped to shape who I am today and though it's my past I have learned valuable trust is earned not given. You will understand that needing space doesn't mean you walk away, it just means space. You'll fight for me...because I'm worth fighting for.

Together we will do this life, laugh through it, cry through it, and create fantastic memories because of it.'ll be strong enough to lead me yet gentle enough to walk along side me.

I wonder sometimes if this kind of man exists. I wonder if my "list" is just too much. And then I realize that this very list is what has kept me from continuing to make poor choices so, I guess that's enough said.

Do you have a list? Do you know of something I need to add to mine?

Till next time my friend....

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Please help

This post is a little different...I am looking for stories/advice about dating. I am working on a book and would like to have other's perspectives besides my own. It can be funny, sad, whatever...I'll change the names so feel free to share it all!! :)

Email me at in advance for helping me!!

Sunday, March 8, 2009


Last night I had dinner with a dear friend who struggles with a secret. We often talk, my friend and I, about both of our secrets and will someone ever be able to fully accept them...we also talk about whether or not God will ever totally remove it; much like Paul asked for the thorn in his side to be removed, but God never did remove Paul's. Honestly, I don't think He will remove my friend's thorn either nor mine. So where does that leave us?

We all have secrets, we all have a past and it's littered with things we wish we'd never done and could change. The degree of those mistakes is what separates us, regardless of Christian or not because this side of heaven there are some things that are worse than others. In God's eyes sin is sin, I get that and I absolutely believe that...but to people it's not that black and white. To people some things are just harder to accept, to forgive.

My friend's's a big one for sure. One that not just anybody can handle or accept or forgive and we both fear that if people at large found out they would not see my friend as a person but as the sin. Boy do I know that fear...I have things I have shared with people that I worry about that happening and I have things that I rarely share because of that very thing.

When do you tell someone your secret? What if you tell and then for whatever reason things between you end and now you have this person knowing your secret walking around with it..will they tell others? But what if you live in fear of telling, not giving others the chance to love you unconditionally, and you never let anyone fully in? This whole secret thing can be hard sometimes.

All I know is this...when someone trusts you enough to share a secret with you, be honored and realize the moment for what it is. Remember this...we are NOT our secrets, they are just a part of our life story and when we start believing that...THAT is when change will happen!!

till next time...

Wednesday, March 4, 2009


What does it mean to be submissive? I know that until recently that word did not sit well with me, it was a word that I saw as a power struggle and one that I would not use. Then I started to research what it means, what God meant when he said in Ephesians 5:22 "Wives submit to your husbands as you do to the Lord". That verse is quoted often, even by people who do not follow God, but the thing about the Bible is it's not meant to be taken one verse at a time, but rather the whole book you find the verse in was written as a letter and intended to be read that way, so when you keep reading the verse after that it says, "For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of his body, the church; He gave his life to be her Savior." Ok, Christ DIED for His bride, the church. The church my friends is you and me, we are the church. Husbands are called to love their wives as Christ loved the church, which was an act of submission on Christ's part till the final end.

So in the way God intended it should look something like this...I submit to you and you submit to me. But what exactly does submission mean? The dictionary in the back of the Bible says this, to be subject to or accountable to another-God, society, fellow believers. Hmm, not exactly the submission definition I'm familiar with, how about you? Submission was never intended to be a sign of weakness, a power struggle, or any form of an abusive nature. It was meant to be an act of love, worship, dedication to those we are in relationship what ever extent.

A husband who comes home after working 12 hours that day, is exhausted and wants to just sit in his chair and withdraw from the world...instead, when he gets home he helps with bath time, kisses his wife because to him she is Beauty, and sits at the table with his family for dinner. He engages himself in his life not because he "has to" but because he wants to, he loves them. THAT is submission and THAT is LOVE! A wife who is exhausted from taking care of screaming kids all day and wants to just get out of the house the minute her husband walks in the in door...instead, she does bath time beside him, she welcomes his kiss because to her he is the knight in shining armor, and she listens to him talk about his day not because she has to but because she wants

If you give your spouse all you have and seek to meet their needs and they in turn do the same...all the needs are met! Simple? Not in the least. Achievable? Absolutely! As Christians we have what's called the Holy Spirit, you do too, just trust me. So when you're coming up on E on your energy tank instead of giving in to that feeling, ask God, ask the Holy Spirit, to give you His strength so that you may love your family as God the form of submission.

till next time....

Monday, March 2, 2009

The sky is not falling...

Yesterday I was part of a very good and heated discussion regarding our economy and our President. I was the youngest person in this conversation and will be honest and say the least affected when our economy started to crash. That all being said, it bothered me that so much of the conversation was based on opinions rather than fact, based on fear rather than Truth. Every person in this conversation is a very strong Christian, seeking to do their part in God's why is it that we as Christians are a bunch of Chicken Little's? Because when the economy started to fall and the stock market ate up the 401K/retirement funds all of a sudden we as humans, as Americans, suddenly realized we are not in control. They all worked hard, were responsible with their money by saving it instead of spending and yet today none of that matters, they have little left to show for it.

Please understand I am not making light of the pain caused by the crash of our economy or the loss of any one's money, I know these are scary times; but it's just that...a time. This moment is not forever, it is simply a moment in our history and one that we will recover from. Yes I know it's scary the way our country is seeming to move right now and I get that things are changing, not necessarily for the good; but aren't we always saying God is in control? Do we really, I mean really, believe that?

We as Christians are called to be separate from this world, we are told to not belong to the things of this world so if we truly don't then why is it still so hard? Because we are still humans living on this side of Heaven. I want my kids to learn from this experience, to learn from not only what's going on politically but also what's going on spiritually. Because we are Christians we need to trust God, even when it's scary; God promises to provide for today's needs, He does not promise we will be able to take that dream vacation. Living is not always fun, easy, or fair. But my goodness we must focus on the living that comes it was pointed out yesterday in the conversation, is it "fair" that we get to walk with God when we die?

I guess my point to this particular writing is this...first off, regardless of what's going on being an American is still far better than any other option out there my friends! Secondly, if you don't like the way things are going instead of just voicing your opinions and spreading negativity, find out the facts, get involved and be positive! And last, if you are a Christian take time to seek what is God saying to you right now, because I promise He's not saying "too bad for you, you can't retire now!"...Our God IS Good, we MUST hold on to that even when it is scary.