The Price

A major part of my purpose, if not my sole purpose, is to help others admit their wounds so they can fully cry out to God and therefore begin to truly heal. I've endured my share of pain as I've walked this earth and I share my stories so that together we can grow and learn and love better and fuller. I share because I want others to know and feel the love that I know and feel from the One who made us. But sharing comes with a price.

My cousin just had her first baby. I can't begin to tell you how proud I am of her and the journey she's carving out. I held that baby on Wednesday, a day after crying out to God that I need a break from pressure I was feeling, and for that moment God said "here, catch your breath by holding my daughter; catch your breath by remembering I am in control; catch your breath by seeing what I create" and in that moment all was right in the world. I handed her back to my cousin and had flashes of when my children were born. Parenting is the best feeling I shall ever have and I am not sure a parent can ever express how grateful they are to hear the sound of "I love you" from the lips of their child, but parenting comes with a price.

The Bible is clear that Christ existed before the world began, before we were created. That means He knew when He made us we would reach a point of needing Him to come die for us. I am still healing from wounds of my past, I am still learning how to be a better mom and yet all that pales when compared to knowing God loved us enough to not only create us but to save us. Creation comes with a price.

Today as I sit and ponder over the last week and all that has gone on, God has brought me back to the basics, reminded me of what really truly matters...the price is always worth it. We endure our vulnerability because we love, we parent because we love, we sacrifice because we love and none of it goes without notice because all of it is through the heart the very One who breathed us into existence. So yes, this week sucked on multiple levels and some of those storms are far from over, but as I watch the light begin to rise outside I know crappy weeks only go so far because my God is way bigger than crappy weeks and some prices are just worth it.