You're Next

I remember being in high school and going to talks that were held in the gym, they were meant to be inspirational talks, but I used that time to sit with my boyfriend, holding hands, and whispering about the upcoming party. I can't recall a single speaker let alone any impact they had on my life. Those talks were free time from class, from school, from teachers.

This morning I talked with a friend about how to take her idea and branch it out, reach more of the next generation and in essence give them the very talks I tuned out, because now later in life I cling to those types of talks. I've thought about this conversation all day--how could the message be spun in a way that ears will not just hear, but hearts will grab onto, believe in, and become?

I'm quick to admit faults I've made with my children, not because I want to say "man I'm such a screw up" but because I believe lessons are learned in order to be taught. The older I've gotten, the older my children have gotten, and the more conversations I have with other the more I have come to realize WE ARE DOING IT WRONG.

Kids are smart. Really smart. So for us to stand in front of them and list off a bunch of "words to live by" is empty. If we stand in front of them and tell them all the things we did wrong, they will just assume "I will not be like you." And if we give them rules to obey because we think it'll help them make wiser choices, we've only created barriers between them and us. None of that stuff works...totally.

What do we need? What WILL work?

I received a Thank You note the other day from a girl who's in her early 20's, I've only met her once (5 months ago) and in her note she stated "thank you for taking the time to ask about my life, to care." What I learned in that Thank You note is this: By having one conversation of being intentional, pausing in the moment and truly being present, letting that person know I'm totally listening and I actually want you to share is worth far more than the list of books to read that will impact your life, the list of TedTalks to watch that will stretch your thinking, or the pep rallies to attend that will inspire you to become the next president of something.

Relationship.

It's all about relationship. I'm not talking about the type of relationship that requires constant attention. I'm talking about the fact that we are relational beings, we want to be heard, we want to know we matter. 

So, instead of complaining about the upcoming generation and all the things you see wrong with it, pause and invest; take the time to be relational. Instead of expecting everyone else to do the work for you, instead of feeling like there's nothing you can do, be active and intentional with those you come in contact with; because when it's all put together from pep rallies to check out lanes is when lives are changed.

I talked with that young lady over lunch and honestly I can't recall the conversation, but that moment wasn't about me, it was about her. I don't need to recall the conversation, God was present, doing His thing and I was the vessel He used (a prayer I pray often, let me be your vessel)

You're next. Be the vessel. Be present. Be relational.