and we're off

Well hello! I must say that as I begin to type these words my hands are beginning to sweat. It's very scary for me to think of sharing my writing with people I've never met, people that may not understand my heart and misunderstand my words. But I also know that this is the next step God has been calling out to me.

For sometime I've felt Him saying it's time for your next step. For sometime I've answered by simply saying I don't know what that is; and it's the truth. I've been torn over what exactly that next step should be. I got so worked up over trying to figure out what it was He wanted me to do that I lost sight of the very concept that the One who said move would also be the One to provide the light for the direction. All I had to do was be patient and willing.

And here I am. The next step I'm learning doesn't mean God will tell me the next hundered steps that will happen over the next six months. It doesn't mean God will send me a letter in the mail and it will say "DO THIS" in red bold letters. It also doesn't mean the next step will be totally clear. Then one night while journaling I began to pour out my fear that I will make the wrong decisions, go in the wrong directions and screw the whole thing up. I also realized that I am still trying to control what that next step should be. I have my own ideas, my own adgendas, and my own dreams. I ended that journaling with this sentence.. "God, please tell me what to do. Please show up in a way that I know it's you, giving me peace in the decision and leaving no room for question."

I've come to see once again that when I finally lay it at His feet, surrender my desires and regain focus on what truly matters it is then that He shows up. Blogging is one of those ways. It is my prayer that each of the eyes that read these words will not see me but will see God's light shining brightly. I hope that over time you will begin to hear my heart and remember that my deepest desire is to get out of the way just enough that I am merely a vehicle through which the Creator shines.

So, this is my next step..what is yours? I'll be praying He shows up clearly and loudly!

I look forward to learning about you, hearing your stories, and hope that together we will grow towards the men and women God intended us to be.

Till next time my friend...