The road i'm on

The road we are on is not paved with smoothness, no it is rocky and uneven. The road we are on is not meant to make us "feel" good, but rather make us good. The road we are is not for us, but for Him.

Today I announced that I no longer think it is the devil trying to cause trouble in my life lately, no instead I think it is God trying to test me, push me, help me grow. After all, I asked for that to happen; I pray continuously for God to use me, to help me be more like Him, to get rid of the old me. And yet when He starts doing it I'm quick to say "get thee behind me Satan". Sigh, I have so much to learn.

The lesson...look in the mirror. Interesting how God lays upon ones heart to talk to others about the very thing He's going to take that person through. Mirrors, something we look into in order to make sure we look "good", to make sure the outside is presentable. But the mirror God has been using, it's looking inside, past the surface and right into the heart. The mirror is also looking into the hearts of others, looking past their surface as well.

A mirror can wound just a much as a word. A mirror can help just as much as a word.

God's love is unconditional, regardless of how I feel. His love never depends on the reflection in the mirror, it simply just exists. Maybe, just maybe, God is holding the mirror for ME to see HIM; maybe it's not about "look at how ugly you're being right now; your inside doesn't match your outside" maybe what it's really about is for the reflection of unconditional love to be seen in a way that breaks through the wounds, breaks through the exhaustion, breaks through the tears and fear. Maybe, just maybe the mirror isn't bad after all.

The road I am on consists of twists and turns and going the wrong way down the road. The road I am on is filled with unknown, unexplainable, and outrageous God. As I often say, and often forget, it's all about perspective. Tonight the perspective has shifted from "it just keeps coming at me" to "praise God for testing for that is what grows my character and godly character is all I'm really after any way".