Summer Time

Tonight I will have all my kids home...for one night. Tyler and Kaity have been gone for a week at their dad's; tomorrow they leave with their Grandparents for vacation to New York...for a week. When they come home they all will then turn around three days later and leave for another week, each going in a different direction. I have to exhale slowly as I write those words, I have to remind myself that summer will soon be over and life will return to normal. I also have to remember my prayers for them.

My children did not ask for the life we've had, they did not have any say in the decisions that were made. They have simply been along for the ride. We've cried many times together and we've cried many times alone. I'm sure they have cried together, without me. I'm also sure they have no idea how much I have cried without them.

Today, as I prepare tacos for dinner (per their request) and get as much writing done as I can so they have my full attention tonight....today I can't help but smile because I remember my prayers for them. I don't often share from my personal journal, but I will for this part...

"My Abba,

I'm not sure why you have allowed me to be their mom, but I am grateful you did. I ask that you cover them from my decisions, protect them from harm from others. I want so badly to keep them from getting any more wounded than they already are, but I know that is not possible. I know they must walk their own journey, in their own way, and I know they must endure this side of heaven just like me. I don't need to ask you to be with them for I know that you already are. I want to go deeper than that, I want to go beyond the surface prayer and pray from my heart...as a mother that you've allowed me to be. So, I long to get out of the way enough for your light to shine. Bless them beyond their dreams and give them a childhood they will look back on and see you at every corner. Every corner."

Amen


Till next time....