Day 23. Finding wholeness

"When someone shows you their true colors, believe them. When someone says 'This is who I am' believe them."  Words spoken by the late Maya Angelo; words that have stuck with me since I first heard them in the late 90's although it hasn't been until recently that I began to grasp what she meant.

When will I come across a man I can trust? When will I meet a person that is truly who they present themselves to be? When can I lay my walls down? These are questions I wrestle with often and every time the answer I hear in my heart is the same--that's only found in Jesus. Which frankly, in my humanness, makes me mad and brings me peace all in the same breath.

I want to reach a point where I can be in relation with someone (whether friendship or romantic) and trust what he/she tells me. I want to know with certainty that he/she won't leave me, won't hurt my heart, and won't betray my trust. Understanding I will never have that is a difficult pill to swallow.

And then I think about the times Jesus was betrayed, the times Mary was ridiculed for being pregnant, the times God watched His Son endure heartache...


People are broken. That's the bottom line. People are broken and selfish and not 100% trustworthy. Most people  mean well, they have good intentions, but they are people and people are broken. There's a song with lyrics "I'm bent but not broken" and though I understand the notion, I beg to differ--we are straight up broken and it's in that brokenness we face the fork in the road. At the admission of brokenness we will either put on masks and put up walls or we will turn to God for hope and healing.

 The gift is, the decision is ours. 

We long to be surrounded by people that will love us, be completely safe for us and we understand that just doesn't exist. Instead of feeling despair over that, instead of giving in and responding from a place of hopelessness, I encourage you to take a risk and go to church this Christmas. Take a risk and reach your hand out to the only One that offers absolute unwavering trustworthy love.  For it's in the protection of Him that we are able to love the unlovable--broken people of which I am at the top of the list.

Heed Maya's words, befriend from a place of wisdom, instill healthy boundaries but never believe the lie that says "You'll never be in a place of trust where you can just be you."  We're broken for a reason, it's in the brokenness we find the beautiful peace of Jesus Christ.

It's in that peace we are made whole.